Confused between friendly and over friendly..!
We were in a cafe in CP, Delhi. We were discussing about some get together/parties, A sudden response from a friend(lady), across the table, in that party, you were over friendly. Actually the word was not over friendly this some thing more negative. I was shocked, everyone were looking for my response. I couldn't speak even a word, I guess how can some one speak in this type of situation.But some how I and lady just made the moment comfortable.
But I always summarize my day, I always summarize my bad things, right now am not saying that this is my bad thing. I know I am more jolly, more friendly. But I didn't find any bad i this. Because of this I met a number of new friends, a number of new mentors.
But still something is wrong, may be I am over reacting on a small thing, but sometime its good to analyze yourself, and thanks to god, I have a team of good friends who always behave like my mentor/adviser.
This was a group chat on Facebook and whats App, I asked them : " Am I over friendly (-ve ways), please provide some details too ;)".
The very first reply : " Yes... but not much, 10-15% ;). Dumbo don't think much, you are good as you are..."
Then some more replies:
" Not over friendly, you just talk with a nice smile, and from heart. You seems over friendly because you didn't know how to play... you only do what your heart want, you only speak what you want :), you are almost perfect "
" Yes you are over friendly, its best when you are in your group, but sometime its awkward when you talk to someone unknown, personally I feel this when I met you first time, but later on I realize that you are sweet heart :), so jyada na soch :P :P "
" I don't think you are over friendly, yes you want to help without selfishness, you wanted to know my problems when we just met, you tried to short out those, you tired to make me comfortable in unknown city... if important thing, you knew that I am committed, so you are really nice dear, you are perfect, you are really a great friend, I hardly know any guys who can be so caring, helpful..... koi tension.. ya break up hai to bindas rah.... kal mil, metro me ladkiyan tadyenge :) "
" Hmm .. yes somewhat... but that's not a big deal... its your nature.. and later on in a frendship or relation your nature is a very positive point.. Keep it, just try to avoid with new ones.. sometime they don't feel comfortable .."
One of my office mate said:
" Look, there are three type of people in society, 1. they don't talk much.... 2. They talk, but due to some shyness they talk to opposite sex people less 3. They talk , they are jolly, they didn't think much what anyone is thinking about those. All categories are good. You belong to 3rd one, and people on 1st and 2nd categories may think that you are over friendly .... :) So its all rite. Its person to person perspective, don't try to change yourself for someone, unless the person is much important.'
Mixed reaction, but motivated, at least someone point out this as a positive point, some people are happy because of my nature. And personally my nature help me a lot.
Sometime ago, I met a lady in office, I just initiated to talk her. She was at least 3-4 years elder than me. We become good friends in next 20-25 days. And later on we worked on same assignment, in which I have to report her. So, I was comfortable with her.
And a number of time in office I met new people, I just met them with smile, praise them truly and you know it make a number of my task to be happened very easily. Usually there is Developer-Tester Rivalry in IT, but due to my this nature, a number of time, I avoid this rivalry.
Recently, I met some guys from china, who were supporting us in some project. They used to sit on different floor, we usually called them to our seat and they got irritated. Usually they started to avoid. But one day we were working late night, I discuss with them about their family, their tradition, sport they like... after that they were very comfortable with me. I know professionally its not appreciated, but I like it, it make my efficiency better in both professional and personal field.
So may be I talk to new people with out shyness, may be I tried to know people, I want to make them comfortable with me, I want to help... but I am not over friendly. I am just a guy who just initiate friendship and its my proud.
But I always summarize my day, I always summarize my bad things, right now am not saying that this is my bad thing. I know I am more jolly, more friendly. But I didn't find any bad i this. Because of this I met a number of new friends, a number of new mentors.
But still something is wrong, may be I am over reacting on a small thing, but sometime its good to analyze yourself, and thanks to god, I have a team of good friends who always behave like my mentor/adviser.
This was a group chat on Facebook and whats App, I asked them : " Am I over friendly (-ve ways), please provide some details too ;)".
The very first reply : " Yes... but not much, 10-15% ;). Dumbo don't think much, you are good as you are..."
Then some more replies:
" Not over friendly, you just talk with a nice smile, and from heart. You seems over friendly because you didn't know how to play... you only do what your heart want, you only speak what you want :), you are almost perfect "
" Yes you are over friendly, its best when you are in your group, but sometime its awkward when you talk to someone unknown, personally I feel this when I met you first time, but later on I realize that you are sweet heart :), so jyada na soch :P :P "
" I don't think you are over friendly, yes you want to help without selfishness, you wanted to know my problems when we just met, you tried to short out those, you tired to make me comfortable in unknown city... if important thing, you knew that I am committed, so you are really nice dear, you are perfect, you are really a great friend, I hardly know any guys who can be so caring, helpful..... koi tension.. ya break up hai to bindas rah.... kal mil, metro me ladkiyan tadyenge :) "
" Hmm .. yes somewhat... but that's not a big deal... its your nature.. and later on in a frendship or relation your nature is a very positive point.. Keep it, just try to avoid with new ones.. sometime they don't feel comfortable .."
One of my office mate said:
" Look, there are three type of people in society, 1. they don't talk much.... 2. They talk, but due to some shyness they talk to opposite sex people less 3. They talk , they are jolly, they didn't think much what anyone is thinking about those. All categories are good. You belong to 3rd one, and people on 1st and 2nd categories may think that you are over friendly .... :) So its all rite. Its person to person perspective, don't try to change yourself for someone, unless the person is much important.'
Mixed reaction, but motivated, at least someone point out this as a positive point, some people are happy because of my nature. And personally my nature help me a lot.
Sometime ago, I met a lady in office, I just initiated to talk her. She was at least 3-4 years elder than me. We become good friends in next 20-25 days. And later on we worked on same assignment, in which I have to report her. So, I was comfortable with her.
And a number of time in office I met new people, I just met them with smile, praise them truly and you know it make a number of my task to be happened very easily. Usually there is Developer-Tester Rivalry in IT, but due to my this nature, a number of time, I avoid this rivalry.
Recently, I met some guys from china, who were supporting us in some project. They used to sit on different floor, we usually called them to our seat and they got irritated. Usually they started to avoid. But one day we were working late night, I discuss with them about their family, their tradition, sport they like... after that they were very comfortable with me. I know professionally its not appreciated, but I like it, it make my efficiency better in both professional and personal field.
So may be I talk to new people with out shyness, may be I tried to know people, I want to make them comfortable with me, I want to help... but I am not over friendly. I am just a guy who just initiate friendship and its my proud.
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